A Sexy Rollercoaster Ride/Yes, Jenni

Well kids, if any of you were planning on asking for my hand anytime soon, back the fuck off. You snooze and you lose, because Jenni has asked for my hand. She's a little wacky cutie with weak hamstrings, a winning smile, and know-how in the ole bedroom. Sign me up, kid, and call me your missus.

Now, for anyone who is planning on poppin' the question soon, take a lesson from Mizz Jenni P. She wowed me with promises of ice cream, movies at the old ARC and Toblerone bars. This bitch has got me DOWN.

So you know, Jenni, or Mrs. Grae, Skip and Steve (the Robbins Brothers) will actually send a limo to our house so we can pick out rings...their latest commercial discusses this very thing. They are going to give us unique settings, displaying the depths of our love and affection all in that little band of promises. I think I want mine to be something fluorescent. Because that's how hot my love burns for you.

See, to those of you who don't understand Jenni's and my Thang, we both love raspberry jello and people who eat other people for nourishment. Rarely do two people meet on such a deep level, and if you don't approve of our union, then you can just blow it out your ear.

Jenni-face-pookie-time wants to take me to Hawaii, which neither she nor I have been to. She knows that my favorite activities are eating roast pig (when I'm not eating people) and SCUBA diving. I love watching sunsets on the porch and making out, too.

So we're set.

Tell me, Jay-Jay-lover-girl-boo-boo, would you prefer a summer wedding on the beach? Like, a nice part of Santa Monica? It could be so heavenly...we can hire some homeless dudes to hold the flower arrangements. You can wear your projectionist polo, and I'll put on my server's apron from the ARC...or we can just wear artfully arranged palm fronds. Whichever. We can hire the gypsies from the barbecue, and ask Trey to make a special "So you're fuckin' her in the ass..." reference in our honor.

I'll buy you a beer Koozie, baby. You're the greatest. Bring on that handtruck!

sapphic. g